trans flag

Putting the T in LGBT

We’ve all heard the expression LGBT Community. Yet too often that very thing – community – is most lacking. There are lines drawn in the sand all over the place: between gay men and women; between gays and bis; between trans* and everyone else; and between all the different shades of grey that make up each stripe of our little rainbow. Humans are essentially contrary creatures and too often it’s the case that the more marginalised we are ourselves, the quicker we’ll kick discrimination down the line to someone else. (more…)

gay pride born this way

Coming Out: A Never-Ending Process

I’ve just read a great blog post about coming out, which has got me thinking (again) about the whole process. I always say I came out at 14, but of course that’s not strictly true. What I mean by that is I told my best friends (via email – my bestie responded with I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) but everyone else took a little bit longer, and it’s a process that’s still not really over. It never will be. (more…)

gay sex

What is (Gay) Sex?

Dur, right? I’m a bit old for the talk about the birds and the bees.

Or am I? As a gold-star dyke, according to some people’s definition of what sex ‘is’ I could well be considered a virgin. But that’s my business, right? What I do and who I do it with is irrelevant to everybody else so they can all keep their beaks out. As long as I’m not breaking the law, it’s all good.

Except when the government gets involved.

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drag queens

Heteronormativity and the Myth of the ‘Gay Lifestyle’

How many times have we heard the expression, the “gay lifestyle”. What, exactly, is it? We know what our detractors say, we’re promiscuous and immoral and obsessed with sex and youth. We’re all fundamentally flawed, broken; the gay lifestyle is incompatible with happiness. We’re deeply, deeply miserable (excuses for) human beings who adopt a happy, campy air in order to sucker the next generation into our vast whirlpool of misery and self-loathing. The gay lifestyle is nothing if not self-propagating. (more…)

rainbow body

Sluts, Straights and Stereotypes

I hate the word slut.

More than hate; I despise it, I detest it, I loathe it. It is a horrible, judgemental, prejudiced word. It’s one of those words that says far more about the person using it than the person it’s addressed to. When I see reviews like the ones below, I have to grit my teeth to stop from screaming. (more…)

love is love

Perpetuating the Myths

I’m talking gay stereotypes. The bulldyke, the screaming queen. You know them, I know them. Heaven forbid anyone should write about them. Because, y’know, they’re stereotypical. Most gay people aren’t like that. Most gay people hate to be associated with people like that. Most gay people are ordinary men and women just like you and me who feel no particular urge to fill their lives with glitter and sparkles.

How dull for them.

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sherlock holmes

Queering Sherlock Holmes

I know, right? I can practically see the eyes rolling. “Pick something difficult!” the people cry. “Set yourself a challenge.”

Face it, Holmes and Watson have been done to death. I know it, you know it, we all know it. ‘Nuff said, right? Wrong. Because I was involved in a discussion on a forum recently that suggests that actually most people don’t know what’s queer about them at all. (more…)

protest

Casual Homophobia

There’s been enough talk in the media this month about people wanting to round us gays up, put us in camps, beat us straight, take our rights away and otherwise treat us worse than animals. That’s not what this post is about. Instead, I want to think about the casual, everyday homophobia ingrained in our culture. Behaviour people don’t even realise is homophobic. Behaviour by people who, if you called them homophobes, would argue vehemently they are pro-gay and support equal rights.

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